Today I met a child and she was showing me her pets.
The first was some giant African land snails and I said “I used to have them but one ate the other one”
Then she showed me her sea monkeys and I said “my brother had them but put all the food in at once and one got really big and ate all the others”
Last she showed me a shoe box of chuckypigs and I said “I did the same thing when I was your age but dreamt they grew big like monsters and ate me”
So yeah don’t let me near kids.
I bet Rick Astley struggles with Lent.